Many who know us know that I have been battling my own personal battle in health for 3 years now and am currently on the road to recovery after ROUND 3.
I was blessed to been given Round 3 of my neurological/spinal virus (Often referred to as “Vinny the Virus”) and have since procured a few more diagnostics including; PoTS, severe vitamin deficiencies, as well as rampant and chronic inflammation in my muscle tissue, nerves, organs and now my brain.
And I know what you’re thinking…. Did you just say BLESSED?! Yes... because that just means that God knew I was strong enough. He knew WE were strong enough.
This past month has been a grind in my road to recovery though. It seems like I take two steps forward and ten steps back. Throughout my life I’ve always said, that I may get knocked down 9 times, but I’ll always Get Up 10. Well... lately it seems I’ve been knocked down 11.... or 20 times…
Over the past two years the only resounding feeling I’ve had is that I’m broken. That I’m never going to be the same as I was before this virus attacked my spine and central nervous system. That I’ll never get back to my former self.... and I was right.
I’ll never be that person again. She’s long gone. She was weak. She didn’t know how strong she really was. She didn’t know how to fight day in and day out with inner demons and extreme physical pain. She didn’t appreciate the simple pleasures in life. She was scared of the unknown and the unplanned.
I was blessed to been given Round 3 of my neurological/spinal virus (Often referred to as “Vinny the Virus”) and have since procured a few more diagnostics including; PoTS, severe vitamin deficiencies, as well as rampant and chronic inflammation in my muscle tissue, nerves, organs and now my brain.
And I know what you’re thinking…. Did you just say BLESSED?! Yes... because that just means that God knew I was strong enough. He knew WE were strong enough.
This past month has been a grind in my road to recovery though. It seems like I take two steps forward and ten steps back. Throughout my life I’ve always said, that I may get knocked down 9 times, but I’ll always Get Up 10. Well... lately it seems I’ve been knocked down 11.... or 20 times…
Over the past two years the only resounding feeling I’ve had is that I’m broken. That I’m never going to be the same as I was before this virus attacked my spine and central nervous system. That I’ll never get back to my former self.... and I was right.
I’ll never be that person again. She’s long gone. She was weak. She didn’t know how strong she really was. She didn’t know how to fight day in and day out with inner demons and extreme physical pain. She didn’t appreciate the simple pleasures in life. She was scared of the unknown and the unplanned.
But this is me now. Broken or not... but stronger than I’ve ever been inside.
I know, undoubtedly, that only through the Atonement we can return, perfectly, to our Father in Heaven. I’m a long way from perfect but I’m also a long way from broken. I’m whole, I’m stronger and I’m fighting. And for now, that’s all that matters.
Yes, I have endured some things that I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy, but the level of support and love I have had surrounding me in unparalleled. I have an amazing family, incredible friends and support systems and most importantly; a ROCK of a husband who has had to hold me up (sometimes literally) throughout the entirety of our marriage. And yet, here he is, still holding me up. I don't know how or why I was so lucky to find someone as strong, brave, selfless, and courageous as he is or to be surrounded with TRUE “GREATNESS,” but despite it all, I am blessed. Here’s to continued healing and the road of recovery #3 with my eternal sweetheart and my family by my side yet again.
Coincidentally, I got an email from my amazing brother in the mission field. His closing thoughts to the family were as simple as this: “Keep grinding. I know the world is crazy, but as we focus on the Lord, it will seem a lot less crazy!!”
So here’s to you Rhetter.... For now, I’m just going to “keep grinding.”
I know, undoubtedly, that only through the Atonement we can return, perfectly, to our Father in Heaven. I’m a long way from perfect but I’m also a long way from broken. I’m whole, I’m stronger and I’m fighting. And for now, that’s all that matters.
Yes, I have endured some things that I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy, but the level of support and love I have had surrounding me in unparalleled. I have an amazing family, incredible friends and support systems and most importantly; a ROCK of a husband who has had to hold me up (sometimes literally) throughout the entirety of our marriage. And yet, here he is, still holding me up. I don't know how or why I was so lucky to find someone as strong, brave, selfless, and courageous as he is or to be surrounded with TRUE “GREATNESS,” but despite it all, I am blessed. Here’s to continued healing and the road of recovery #3 with my eternal sweetheart and my family by my side yet again.
Coincidentally, I got an email from my amazing brother in the mission field. His closing thoughts to the family were as simple as this: “Keep grinding. I know the world is crazy, but as we focus on the Lord, it will seem a lot less crazy!!”
So here’s to you Rhetter.... For now, I’m just going to “keep grinding.”
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